one too many things to rant about, here goes nothing.
i am simply amused at the fact that if one is persistent enough, one can actually succeed. what i'm saying is, i find it funny and to me it's a joke to see a 'bestfriend wannabe' actually made her way to the top, in replacement of me. note that this is not jealousy, i am just amused.
you know, i have never made any form of public declaration or announcement on the 'drama'. not because i was at fault or embarassed or anything. i just didn't see the need to announce it to the world because there was nothing to annouce in the first place and now to the world, i apparently 'walked out', wtf. so even the closest or acquaintances gives me the 'stare' everytime i bump into them. i don't know which is more disappointing, the fact that some of the closest just heard one side of the story and didn't even bother to ask me about it and took sides OR the fact that I befriended such people, enlighten me.
i mean, in all honesty, bias much? i really don't care what acquaintances or strangers think of me, but those that you grew up with in high school ends up judging or should i say, couldn't give a fcuk about finding out the truth first, is not acceptable.
people make mistakes. god knows how you compare or rate mistakes on a scale that gave you right to say my mistake is bigger than yours. goddamnit, and stop portraying me as some shitass lousy bestfriend that ditched her bestfriend for her other half. if i had the other half, then by all means. tiu.
i asked God kindly today, if i were to forfeit my birthday this year as a sacrifice, can i have better birthdays in the future? because i don't remember being happy without having to shed some tears at the same time for the past few birthdays.
all i'm really asking for is just a simple HAPPY birthday without me feeling like crap/shit on the week of my birthday, the day before my birthday, the day itself or after that. i don't think i'm asking for too much. seriously.
i'll be good, promise.
"hai ai ni.. dai yi tian hen.."
